Vanilla Bean Macarons and the World's Greatest Buttercream

When your grandmother hands you a tube with five vanilla beans and says "make more macarons," you tend to take her seriously. Luckily enough, the choir I'm in was in charge of food for a church event a few days later and I had agreed (obviously) to make macarons. (Since trying these, the choir director has requested that I teach a macaron making class. Obviously, these were winners.)

Now if you think these are somehow boring because they're vanilla, then you should feel ashamed of yourself. Did you not read the title where it said VANILLA *BEAN*?? This is not your cheap "vanilla" what-is-this-crap "flavor." This is true vanilla. Just enough to say "holy sweet baby Jesus, this is the best vanilla thing I have tasted in my lifetime, or at least since I last had good creme brulee."

Go ahead and set out everything for your icing. If you like, you can measure out your heavy cream in a bowl or something so the whole thing doesn't stay out. In fact, I'm about 99% sure that's what I did, but I've slept since then, so who really knows. But DEFINITELY have the butter out so it can get closer to room temp, if not all the way there.

This is a vanilla bean pod that's been cut in half, and one half had it's first scraping. Those teensy blackbrown dots on the cutting board? THOSE are the actual beans. And oh sweet Mary, do they smell diviiiiine. To make scraping the beans out easier, I cut them in half like you see above, then cut a slit from the hard tip to your cut end. Boom! Easy access has never been sweeter.

There are THOUSANDS of beans in there. Scrape as many as you can without getting the pod in there. A little pulp from the inside is fine, although snooty people say otherwise. I am obviously as snooty as a shot of Jack Daniels in a glass of lemonade. All to say, you probably won't get every dang one. This is okay. Also, they'll get on your fingers. This is also okay.

SO MANY SEEDS! Just run the tip of your knife down the inside of the pod and they'll collect like little magnetized shavings. It's pretty awesome. Oh, and yes, your cutting board will get stained. Boo hoo. Oh well.

This was when I had finished. Note the lack of beans? There's your sign. Just throw these things in the garbage disposal. Bonus, your kitchen will smell EVEN MORE like vanilla.

Sift your almond flour and powdered sugar and stir together to make your Not Bisquick mix using your BFF, Jill. If your hard spatula is named Jill.

Here was my seedy harvest. Heh. Heheh. Seedy harvest. Heh.

Alright, now remember to froth your egg whites until they look like ginger ale, right? Before you think of adding in sugar, put in your vanilla bean. I used my knife and just tapped to loosen them.

NOW you can dump in your sugar and proceed to watch the magic happen.

Let it be on a low setting until the mixture's all happy, then crank that sucker up. POOF!

Watching the vanilla beans swirl around in there nearly made me drool.

Your final meringue. Honestly, I could've eaten this on my own. Maybe I did...it was just the beaters, come on!

Look at that. Just admire that beauty. Also, lament the fact that my fancy camera hasn't been fixed yet.

Macarronager time! Oh, I guess I left the heavy cream on the counter after all. Oh well. The shells got whipped up pretty quickly.

Your final folded beany concoction of awesome. Slop it in that pastry bag and pipe away on your parchment paper.

I had this adorable idea to sprinkle black sugar on the shells before baking. And honestly, the two shells that got sprinkled looked pretty dang cute. But they did this to my fingers, and later my teeth, so...don't do that. Kaygreat. Stick em in the oven at 325F (convection bake) for 11 to 12 minutes.

The buttercream. YES, it matters that you use unsalted AND salted. Just do it, okay? You'll love me for it if you do. Also, be forewarned: you're gonna have a vat of buttercream on your hands. No joke.

Obviously, my butter wasn't quite soft enough. So what did I do? Cut it, duh.

Yes, this is a lot of butter. WORTH IT.

And yes, it's gonna do the damn butter cluster on your mixer. Scoop it out and give it a stern talking to and it should cooperate.

When you start to get veritable butter walls on the side of the bowl, you're making progress. The butter will also be SUPER light.

Scrape it all down, theeere we go. Almost there...

BOOM. That's just the butter. Yup. Like I said. VAT. Add in your heavy cream and vanilla and let it mix on medium for a bit to get it happy.

THEN POWDERED SUGAR INSANITY.

IF YOU THOUGHT I WAS JOKING ABOUT YOUR VAT OF BUTTERCREAM, THINK AGAIN. Start mixing SLOWLY so it doesn't look like you've had a coke party in there. Don't get me wrong, some will escape. But it is 10000000% worth it.

It'll shrink in size, but let it fluff back up again. It'll basically go to the top of the bowl on my mixer.

Get out a ridged piping tip and swirl some icing in there. No being scant with it! This doesn't require a double layer, though, since the piping normally makes it thick enough and this stuff is RICH.

There you have it. (And yes, for some reason my macarons had little tips. And then I realized "oh great, my macarons for church have little tips that got brown and now they look like little *tits*, aren't I just the most reverent Episcopalian on the planet?!" So when this happens, lay them on their side and no one will know the damn difference.)

This is how much I had left after icing all of them. And sampling the icing myself. And giving a sample to my mom. And letting the dog have a teensy bit because she was giving me doe eyes. I iced some gluten-free lime bars with this and STILL have enough for a sheetcake left over. So...yeah. It makes a lot. But it's so, so, SO worth it in every way.

Salted Caramel Chocolate Popcorn Macarons

When life is about as sucky as a vacuum that won't work, you need happy food.

Catherine Mayhew, blogger of The South In My Mouth, is a local who goes to my church and is a dear friend. We bond over our love of bacon (and yes, Catherine, I'll be making chocolate bacon macarons soon) and all foodie things. Her son is two years younger than me and was one of my first friends at the church (also an avid SnapChat partner). And when she voted Salted Caramel macarons, I couldn't resist. I had made them before for our church's bake sale this summer (she even wrote about them!) and while they went well, I was secretly somewhat dissatisfied. Again, I had emerged with pinwheels instead of flat beauties, again, they were slightly too crunchy, and don't even get me STARTED on the salted caramel. That resulted in a salty sticky mess that took ages to clean up.

I've revamped the recipe. The shell ingredients remained the same, and that I pulled from the Salted Caramel macaron recipe in my handy Macarons and More book. The filling I mixed between Macarons and More, and this recipe for popcorn macarons with salted caramel filling from Eat, Show, and Tell. That's right, I also added popcorn. It adds a perfect crunch to the top and is just swoony.

Filling:

3/4 cup granulated sugar

1/2 cup cream

1/3 cup unsalted butter, cubed

1 teaspoon salt

1/4 teaspoon lemon juice

1/4 cup water (to dissolve gelatin)

1 1/3 teaspoon gelatin powder

Shell:

1 cup powdered sugar

1/2 cup almond flour

3 tablespoons unsweetened cocoa powder

2 egg whites

5 tablespoons granulated sugar

Popcorn:

1/3 cup popcorn kernels

3 tablespoons canola oil

1/4 cup salted butter

Filling first, as it has to chill. Place a saucepan over medium heat and pour in your sugar through a sifter or sieve. I didn't, and I paid for it.

I recommend stirring with a wooden spoon, but stir it constantly. 

See those hard bits? THAT'S why I needed to sift. Any lumps in your sugar will stay lumpy. And it sucks butt. And they make a megalump.

 

It'll mostly all melt eventually, and in the meantime it smells heavenly.

Now would be a good time to heat up your cream in another saucepan, or just zap it in the microwave, until bubbles start to form around the edge. Turn on your overhead vent and CAREFULLY pour in the cream while stirring with a long wooden spoon. Yes, it matters. Now turn it down to low. 

Pictorial evidence of the megalump that formed when I finished with the cream. Some did eventually dissolve over the low heat, but dissolving more would've risked burning the caramel.

Once combined, add your butter a cube or two at a time and stir until melted. Add in your salt and stir. Have your lemon juice and water in a measuring cup, then quickly and thoroughly stir in the gelatin powder. 

IE, NOT THIS. -.-

Add this mix to the caramel. Any lumps in the gelatin will melt out, don't worry. Stir stir stir until you think there's absolutely no way there could be gelatin lumps, then pour in a metal bowl, cover with saran wrap, and stick it in the fridge. This needs some time, preferably overnight, to set up. It also probably wouldn't hurt to stir it every few hours.

Now the popcorn. If you've never popped popcorn on the stove, what are you doing with your life? Seriously, what the heck is wrong with you? I'm ashamed of you. It's pretty much the easiest thing EVER. No joke. Take a decent sized pan with a lid, like a large saucepan, and put in your oil with 3 popcorn kernels over medium heat and cover. When the first one pops, add the rest. POPPING EXTRAVAGANZA! When it slows to around 3 seconds between pops, take it off the heat and pour into a bowl. Turn the heat off the unit, but take the butter and melt it in the pan you just used. When it's all golden and melty, pour it over your popcorn and toss with a big ol spoon. Wham bam boom, guys. Salty, buttered deliciousness. Get about a cup full and smash it to bits in a plastic bag with a rolling pin.

This is great when you've had an especially crappy day. Yell expletives and take out your bad mood on those popcorn buds! And don't worry about what the neighbor thinks. Bashing things with a rolling pin is totally normal.

And finally, the shells. Preheat for convection at 325 again. Sift your powdered sugar, then almond mealflourstuff, then coca powder. 

Stir to combine as thoroughly as possible. 

Beat your egg whites until frothy, add the sugar, mix to combine, then WHIP AWAY! When you have the meringue, fold the dry mix in by about thirds. 

Then MACARRONER! I also heard the term macaronnage today, and I didn't take French, so I have no idea which term is right. I'll probably start say macaronnager because why the heck not. 

Pipe onto your parchment, then sprinkle with the popcorn bits. YUMS. 

Bake for 11 minutes.

When they're cooled, pipe or spoon the caramel onto the macaron shells. WARNING: THIS FILLING IS MESSY. BUT IT IS DELICIOUSLY MESSY AND MUCH LESS MESSY THAN THE ORIGINAL RECIPE. Have a container ready for your assembled macarons to go in. 

You'll probably have leftover caramel and popcorn, in which case you can mix them and, if you're the brave type, use it to dip the macarons in while eating them. You can also use it on top of ice cream, cake, bread pudding, or a spoon. You know. I mean, I can't be the only one who goes after peanut butter in the jar armed with just a spoon...

Let them chill for two hours and they'll be perfect. Or go ahead and...uh...taste test. You know. For poison and stuff. Yeah.

Methods and Madness

First, I apologize for not having posted sooner. My body was all "A wild Coumadin appeared! IT'S SUPER EFFECTIVE!!" And now I've basically become a hemophiliac overnight. If you tell my body that you want thin blood, it gives you THIN BLOOD. For you medically inclined folks out there, my IMR was a 5.27 when I went in last time--up from our first post-reading of 4.89. Yippity skippity. Needless to say, I've had the energetic capacity of a sloth on tranquilizers.

On to the post, though. Everyone has different methods and tips for making macarons. Some methods are genuinely helpful, and can be honestly classifiable as true "methods." Others are just stupid, and have to be stuck with the label of cadswallop: "madness." Some things that are madness to me may work for you. I can respect that. But these are things that, in my book, are just simply madness.

Italian Meringue 

While the term "sadist" comes from the Marquis de Sade, the Italians win this one on Machiavellian masochism. The French method of making macarons is my go to, and the sane person's go to. Simply add the granulated sugar to the egg whites, knowing the mechanical energy of whipping them together will cook it enough to be stable. There is no logical reason to make a sugar syrup to pour into your egg whites and then whip. You have to temper egg. TEMPER. EGG. With HOT SUGAR SYRUP. Nothankyounonononope. That is elebenty times more difficult for no reason. The logic is to partially cook the eggs. If you whip your meringue just right, you've already done that via mechanical energy. Egg whites are kind like that. Plus, that means even more to clean up. Ick.

The Food Processor

I have finally come to terms with the fact that my food processed doesn't do anything to help my almond flour and powdered sugar come together. All it does is encourage the creation of impossibly hard little almond sugar lumps so you toss out more than you need to. Now, if you need to grind up whole nuts, or freeze-dried fruit, or flower petals or some such? Whip that sucker out, by all means! But only grind the ingredients that can't be sifted as they are. THEN, when they're fine enough (which may mean transferring to a paper towel-covered ziplock and slamming with a rolling pin), sift them into the almond flour and powdered sugar and simply stir to combine. Voila. Way easier.

Almonds vs Almond Meal/Flour vs Almond Powder

If you make your own almond flour each time, then you deserve an award. I would probably only do that if I had super special imported almonds, or flavored almonds I wanted to use. I use Bob's Red Mill Almond Flour. I'd like to try the almond flour at Whole Foods that you can buy by weight. They both work fantastically well. The second is more like a powder, the first more like a meal but still on the fine side. Also, I prefer using flour from blanched almonds. It gives an overall prettier look. If you're looking for more rustic, though, try unblanched. The taste is exactly the same.

You sift HOW MANY TIMES‽

Martha Stewart says to sift twice or even three times when making these things. What. Are. You. Doing. How do you need to do that? When you get the bits that won't sift, you stop sifting. Am I the only one who understands this? I read one comment on a blog today that, no joke, claimed her Parisian grandmother sifted FIVE TIMES with each batch. I DON'T UNDERSTAND. Sift it and be done with it. Move on. You aren't panning for gold, here, and you aren't trying to put in air.

Egg Whites

I said it before and I'll say it again: aging egg whites is stupid. As long as they're at room temperature, you're gonna be just fine. And for crying out LOUD, don't be that person who uses meringue powder or egg white powder. That is a cheapskate way and you can taste it in the final product and I will come haunt you if you use it. Well, okay, I won't because I'm not a ghost. But I will do everything in my powder that doesn't involve too much creepy voodoo work to ensure that a ghost haunts you if you use it. Stop blaming your meringue on the weather, the barometric pressure, the humidity, what you had for dinner, which house your sign is in, what your last fortune cookie said, or whatever. It's all about patience and high speed. Don't be afraid of it and it'll behave. (Oh, I do have one exception: if your great-great aunt owned the mixer originally and the meringue isn't working, ask her permission to use it. Then it works. I know, possessive, right? But who wouldn't be possessive of a KitchenAid?)

Food coloring

I enjoy coloring macarons. I've discovered, though, that liquid coloring really does screw up your batter. They might not rise enough, or at all, or they'll end up overbeaten, or just too runny. Your best option? A variety of gel coloring and powder coloring. Use what you prefer. I have yet to try powder, but I do like that just a little bit of gel goes a LONG way, so I'm definitely getting my money's worth, and the macaron isn't affected by it. Score!

Parchment vs Silpat

I am #TeamParchment till I die, 100%. The Silpat method is great IN THEORY for these, but there are often problems with feet not being as pronounced or the batter running more thanks to the slick surface. I would only use the silicon mats that are literally made for macaron making, with little edged circles for you to fill. Other than that? Use parchment. I almost never have problems with them sticking, and if I do, then I approach more carefully from another direction. Or, if need be, gently twist the macaron off the parchment. Be GENTLE, though. You don't want to smoosh your pretties!

Salted vs Unsalted Butter

I am normally a salted butter person. It keeps longer, it tastes great, blah blah blah. But for baking, I almost always use unsalted butter. Then I can add salt if I want to bring out sweetness, but it isn't a flavor that'll stick out like a sore thumb. In browned butter recipes, I'll use salted butter. I like the flavor of brown salted butter more than unsalted, and think it works really nicely in just about any recipe. I also use salted butter in desserts with melon. I don't know what it is, but it just tastes right to me.

Those are some of my methods. Madness? Maybe. But worth it.

Decisions, decisions...

No, I haven't finished the almond macarons JUST yet. But I am having some trouble figuring out which kind to make next.

-blueberry lemonade

-mango vanilla

-lavender lemon

-lemon white chocolate

-coca cola

-cherry limeade

-pink lemonade

-Nutella

-cornmeal sorghum (savory flavors, WHAAAT‽)

-salted caramel

Comment on Facebook, Twitter (@charlyphraser), or on this post! Winner shall (probably) be decided tomorrow!

The Basic Macaron: Almond

The macaron purist can't resist the beauty of a good almond macaron. They're like fluffy clouds of marzipan combined with a cookie. This is the recipe that started it all for me.

This book looks plain enough. It was labeled for around $5 at the Barnes and Noble by Vanderbilt's campus. I was in a snarky mood when I bought it (as demonstrated by my purchase of the cookbook "Fifty Shades of Chicken" by FL Fowler that night), and a bit of a grouch. I was planning on leaving with my purchases to get a Jambon et Fromage next door at Bread & Co., a Nashville staple, then swinging by Satay for a lychee bubble tea. That's still a favorite combo of mine...

Needless to say, my mood was sour. Then this beauty was all by itself on a shelf of books getting ready to go. Being the cookbook fiend I am, and taking this as a reason to actually try making the things, I grabbed it. I've been in love ever since.

This is the recipe I'll be showing you, and I'll be honest: it wasn't until this round of baking that I got them to look almost exactly like that. So don't stress. This takes some trials. Some tasty, snackalicious trials. Everyone's cool with that, right? (Yes, I do have flavor ideas scribbled on the inside of the book. That's moved to a Pinterest page.)

Almond Macarons, yield 15 macarons

Shells:

- 2 egg whites

- 5 tablespoons granulated sugar

- 1/4 teaspoon almond extract (optional but recommended)

- 1 cup powdered sugar

- 1/2 cup plus 2T almond flour/meal (same difference, y'all)

Filling:

- 3/4 cup powdered sugar

- 1/4 cup unsalted butter, softened

- 1/2 teaspoon almond extract

Separate your egg whites in the stand mixer. Reserve the yolks for something tasty. Make sure your bowl and whisk attachment are clean and dry, otherwise you're gonna have a bad time. And go ahead and preheat your oven to 325F for convection baking.

In a separate bowl, sift your powdered sugar. It should be pretty easy. Then soft your almond flour on top. See those big dudes chilling out in the bottom when you're done? Throw those suckers out. Gone. Donezo. They'll make your life harder. Yes, sifting is THAT worth it. 

Go ahead and get everything else out now if you haven't. Maybe have a cup of tea to calm your nerves. And when you're ready, start your meringue. First, beat on a medium-low speed until frothy.

Kinda looks like ginger ale. Go ahead and add your granulated sugar and, if you like, the almond extract. This was an amendment of mine that I recommend 100%, mainly because I am an almond addict. It might not be your shot of whiskey, but hey, no hard feelings. Mainly because that means I don't have to share with you.

See all that sugar? Start this off at a lower speed so that doesn't go flying all over your kitchen. Let it get happy in there, and when you think it'll be good (I'd say one to two minutes), let the speed go up a bit at a time until you get to 8 or 10. You'll hear that split splat slpoot noise, trust me. Be calm and steady yourself, because in five minutes or less you'll have THIS!

Mmmmm, tasty. My peak disappeared when I fwacked the meringue off the whisk and it splorted on top. I still found a teensy peak for you, though! 

Now, before I go further, you need your best friend. No, not your BFF Jill, your hard spatula.

Call me crazy all you want, but this does the trick. Nothing else. You want a thin spatula with just enough flexibility to bend with the side of the bowl. That's IT. Found her? Good. Then you'll stir the powdered sugar and almond flour to combine them, and you'll have this:

Please don't confuse this for Bisquick. Do, however, pour about a third on top of your meringue.

Stir it just enough to combine it.

Remember, air is SUPPOSED to leave this batter! It's good for it to shrink! Add the rest and combine. It'll look about like this, and get gradually harder to fold. 

Now it's actually the right color! Yay! And now you also start the macaronner process. Remember, stir the batter up the bowl while smoothing and smooshing it. It takes some time, but you'll get there. 

See how it's getting glossier? Gooood sign. It gets easier to stir and you can really smell the almond if you have a sensitive nose like me.

When it runs off the spatula in a pretty ribbon like this, you're perfect. Now for the piping bag.

I use disposable bags with a coupler and tip. It's a billion times easier. I'll even use ziplock baggies with my coupler and tip, which can be handy with big batches since this batter is a sticky mess. I do recommend getting a coupler and tip, just because it makes life easier and only takes two seconds to clean. But if you don't want to go get one, any ziplock bag with a hole cut on the corner will do.

I apologize for the shaky camera, but this is all on my phone since my camera is currently out of commission. Womp womp. I use Sunny Bakery brand tips and couplers in a 12 for piping the shells. I'll either schmear on the icing or pipe it with a ridged tip depending on how I feel.

Fold over your bag somewhere between 1/3 and 1/2 way. This will make sense in a minute if you aren't used to this. DON'T FILL IT UP ALL THE WAY. YOU WILL BE COVERED IN STICKY GOOP AND HATE ME FOREVER. THANK YOU.

Tuck the tip into the palm of your hand so you don't have batter falling everywhere and have a hot mess. Fill it to the top and twist. Get out your cookie sheet and template along with another sheet of parchment.

This is my template. It works great for me, and has lasted probably twenty different trays worth of shells. Throw the second sheet of parchment over it and be ready to pipe!

The weight of the batter will make the Xs easier to see. Start squeezing in the middle, and once you don't see the X, move to the next one. Here, unfortunately, my phone died, so I don't have the piped tray to show you. So imagine them being great (with a couple merging together but who cares, right?) and once cooled, being like this: 

Tada!! Aren't they pretty‽ Now, time for icing.

Your butter will be plenty soft by this point, so take your powdered sugar and butter and dump them in there. Set your mixer on a low setting so your kitchen doesn't look like Miley Cyrus had a coke party in there.

Oh, and this nonsense will happen three or four times. Just scrape out your butter and keep chugging along. 

When it looks less like pie crust and more like icing, like above, add your almond extract. Then scrape the sides of your bowl and whip away!

SO PRETTY :D I went with a butter knife this time because I'm impatient and wanted to get them done so I could eat them sooner. I regret nothing.

When I spread icing on, I spread it on both shells to make sure I don't skimp.

Travesty! I mashed one while icing it!

Obviously it was destined to be a taste tester. See how it's got a thing eggshell outside and a fluffy inside? That, friends, is your goal.

There you have it, folks. Almond macarons. If you're giving these to friends, stick to the rule of throwing them in the fridge for a few hours. If not? Go ahead and nosh to your heart's content. You deserve it.